wow

Wow... that is all I can say right now to describe how I feel. I never realized being a mom would have moments like these. (it's ok, call me stupid) Luke was up literally all night last night crying. I have no idea what was wrong with him. He sleeps for 45 minutes and then wakes up crying and I try to asses what he needs but I always seem to fail at pacifying him. Don't get me wrong, I love being his mommy, but I never realized how much sleep I would lose once he came into my life. The thought never crossed my mind that I wouldn't be able to fix the problem or figure out what's wrong. This is one the hardest things I'm learning to deal with. First I try to let him fuss and cry it out, but then he flips himself over onto his back and gets hysterical. Then I pick him up and rock him and then he falls back to sleep and I try to gently lay him back down... an hour later he wakes up, (just when I fall back to sleep) I check to see if he has a poopy diaper - all clear - and then Matt finally says to me "can't you just feed him?" in an exhausted, sleepless voice. So I do that and he falls asleep in my arms after draining both sides. But to no surprise, he's up 2 hours later crying. My patience is starting to wear thin once I see it's 5 am and I've gotten maybe 2 hours of sleep... so... this word "wow" is about all that can come out right now...